Monday, October 20, 2008

what the pho-ck is an ass hose?

an even better, more perplexing question is how the hell have i survived for twenty-five years without one? the answer: delicately.

i have no idea what the actual name of it is, but in vietnam, people use a water hose instead of toilet paper. well they use toilet paper, too, but it's to dry only. okay, sounds a bit over the top, and flat out weird, right? not true; it's actually ingenious, and households around the world should adopt it as a necessary practice for overall comfort and effectiveness. no more smear. no more clogging due to excessive paper use. you feel great after taking a grove, which is the way you should feel anyway.

it won't work in america, though. half the population's too fat to hit their ass hole with a hose anyway. ha.

going out to a birthday party right now.

1 comment:

matches said...

if i remember anything from crocodile dundee, it is called a 'bidet'. and if the dundee was wary of it, then so am i.